The sky is falling...or is it?

Today at lunch, I was trying to decide the best method to teach about my theories on gravity. My main struggle is trying to decide whether the incompetent fools that surround me at Cambridge can comprehend my vast intellectual abilities, as well as my struggle in trying to prove the understanding of why everything falls to the earth.
Given my recent conversations with Mr. Miller of Bishop Feehan (from the year 2009 A.D.) he explained that after my death (150 years after) to be exact, the formula F = G ((m1 * m2)/(d^2)) proves that my theories were correct. I would like to thank Henry Cavendish for furthering my research.
After careful consideration, I feel that a simple concept that even the smallest of children can understand will help the advancement of Physics. If I sit under a tree, and am hit on the head with an apple, (Red Delicious apples are my favorite) then obviously something had to cause that apple to fall. Similarly, everytime I jump I never leave the earth, I merely "hang" in the air for a little while (but never more than 1 second).